Ringo Mole
John Morgan : Lord Intriguer
The Last Mole Standing
In Bassaleg Fields
TIME LINE 1908-1962
John Morgan, Lord Intriguer, aka Johnny-Boy “ Ringo” Mole “ The Mad Hatter” was the last Man Mole standing in the
reconstituted Intriguer- Gould- Morgan
line of descent.
It was a line that closed during the
infamous Beeching era.
Having been kick
started in womanly glory in 1792 it ended with the embarrassing collapse of all its male Mole Hills in year of our Lord 1962.
The future of Intriguer House was put into the
paws of a contingent of pious Mole
nuns named after the venerable St
Joseph- The Carpenter Mole.
The land slippage was obvious long
before Johnny-Boy’s rise to power.
Johhny -Boy showed no early promise, and was troubled with
pinhead eyes, pinhead ears and a pinhead brain. But he stood tall, aloof, absurdly pompous and
puffed up, and was self-opinionated, even at 12.
His dearest Papa, Freddy–Mole, aka ‘Intriguer the Silent’, gave him the unspoken treatment but that poor sod was tongue tied because by the time Freddy
ever spoke up the conversation had moved on, or the seasons had changed.
Later when Johnny
-Boy came marching home from various inane foreign digs in his 20s he
sported a brand new hat, all just a fashionable fad to make him alluring. These mad hatter escapades was the total extent of his souvenir hunting from numerous sabbaticals ,
even although his irritating little sister
Hon. Avi-ation Gurney Mole asked him to bring her back some bars of striped sticky rock.
After spending
two years avoiding the horse ploughs
of New Zealand where he
befriended some fellow Etonites
in the tangata whenua ,
(Māoris) the indigenous Moles
there, he hardly ever took off his
Fedora or stopped flashing his Eton three fold, reppe striped silk, tie.
Johnny-Boy had several aliases. He fancied himself as being a Mexican bandit, like Garcia
rustling cattle cakes for worms , but he thought “Ringo” was a much better name for
a robbing bastard. He also bought out by bullying all the tortilla chip
mines from peasants, and filled his winter larders as he preferred tortillas to eating worms. The
tortilla deal came with a
free sombrero hat.
When Johnny-Boy
became Lord Intriguer the lawyers told him he didn’t need to rob banks or rail trains or mistreat peasants as the
Intriguer millions ( from banks and rail trains and peasants hard graft ) had already been fully
exploited and pilfered by all kinds of
illegality and stealth by his
ancestors and kinfolk by mastering slavery, rascality
and acts of sodomy.
Johnny-Boy as Lord Intriguer ( after as many deaths as the list of Adrian Messenger
) marked the end of feudalism in the
Bassaleg Fields. Intriguer House was
sold to the Church of Rome as a private Mole School, but with a brilliant snub by Johnny- Boy upon
the ‘National Truss’ - a venomous organisation who were rounding up Mole Hills for the nation and wanted Intriguer
House despite their Inspector, Jimmy Milly-
Mole being a trifle disappointed by the
coarse, unrefined quality of the landscape and the general dimness of the area’s
non-Anglican population.
An Extract from " The Moles of Intriguer House, Bassaleg Fields, South Wales"
A parody on the Morgans of Tredegar House, Newport, South Wales
By William Cross, FSA Scot
A Piece Of Madness - Written During Lockdown
FOR MOLE/ MORGAN ENQUIRIES
PLEASE EMAIL WILL CROSS
williecross@aol.com
John Morgan, 6th And Last Lord Tredegar
Died 17 November 1962
Frederic Charles John Morgan, 6th Baron Tredegar (26 October 1908 — 17 November 1962), was a Welsh Peer and Landowner.
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